I heard the raindrops falling
The tears of eulogy
Your bitter sorrow rolling down
Veiled cheeks you hid from me
Of sea's hushed voice in evening
Hearts knowing, intertwine
As footprints in the sand once there
Swept forth to faith's decline
Though love as such is bitter-sweet
And beauty clouds in strife
In moments here of fleeting bliss
The purest form of life.
Well done! The poem holds a secret, but intrigues the reader by making sense in a condensed way.
ReplyDeleteYour passion for fiction writing shows in this poem that hints at a story.
I loved the second stanza within this poem. The line breaks and descriptive words really made the poem come to life for me. I truly enjoyed the line "Swept forth to faith's decline" and it seemed very "Dickinson".
ReplyDeleteIt reminds me of truly living life; feeling every experience to its fullest.
ReplyDeleteI think you have a wonderful way of imitating Dickinson's style while also making it your own. It is hard to take a poem and try to, in effect, add yourself to it by creating a new version but you have done so and the poem reflects this.
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